Moving with Gratitude for Mental Health with Paris Prynkiewicz
Links
Crooked Illness: Lessons from inside and outside hospital walls
And of course!!!
Elementalkinetics.com (Hint: You’re already here!)
Transcript
Part of my mission here on the work IN is to help equip fitness professionals with a bigger awareness of the overlap between physical and mental health so they can take their wellness beyond what the eyes can see. Not just so they can serve their health conscious clients better and level up their coaching skills but also so they can take care of themselves better.
It’s so important that we stay connected to our own mental health and wellbeing because it’s so easy to push ourselves over the edge, to lose ourselves and when that happens it’s really hard to get back to who you are.
My guest today has a unique, first person perspective on mental illness and a beautiful origin story that’s filled with hope.
- Paris Prynkiewicz is the host of the "Master Your M.E.N.T.A.L" podcast and author of "Crooked Illness: Lessons From Inside & Outside Hospital Walls." She is also a speaker for NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) where she uses her story and voice to bring more conversations about mental health to the table. Paris has her B.A. in Psychology from The University of Arizona, her MBA in Healthcare Administration from Western Governors University and is currently working toward obtaining her M.S. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at GCU. You can also join Paris's FREE gratitude community on Facebook where she gifts you the 28-day gratitude journal she created to help you start and end all your days on the best foot possible! Just search "FREE Gratitude Journal" on Facebook for access!
Let’s start our work IN with Paris Prynkiewicz
Ericka Thomas 0:02
Hey Paris, welcome.
Paris P 0:05
Hey, Ericka, thanks so much for having me. I'm excited.
Ericka Thomas 0:08
All right, well, thank you for being here. And let's just jump right in if you're ready to go. Can you tell us a little bit more about yourself? And really, where did this journey around mental health begin for you?
Paris P 0:25
I love that question. Yeah. So just a little bit more about me is my name is Paris, you guys and I'm from Arizona out here and really where my journey started. is actually from the struggles that I faced within myself and also growing up and seeing a lot of struggles with mental health, you know, inside my own family and just feeling very stuck and trapped and confused and kind of hopeless with that, and not really knowing where to go or move forward from that. So I really decided, you know, the whole journey there's like a whole story in that but you know, 16 years old, I was diagnosed with depression and then at 19 years old, I actually found myself hospitalized. I was diagnosed bipolar, one suicidal struggling so much from inside that hospital with my mental health. And what really inspired me to come out of that is doing the work on myself that I was neglecting for so many years, just spending years neglecting my mental health, which also ended up spiraling into other areas of my life as well.
So I really had to get back on track with that and I just really wanted to continue to do that work. So I actually ended up going at 23. And I ended up going back and working at the exact same clinic where I was a patient at myself. So it was really awesome to be there just to be able to help and serve people who struggled in similar ways to myself and just continuing this journey of trying to unlock more doors for people who feel like they've lost that and feel hopeless when it comes to mental health and accessing care and things like that. So you guys are gonna hear me talk a lot because that's my one of my biggest passions is you know, trying to bridge that gap from between struggling with mental health to prioritizing it and how do we do that?
Ericka Thomas 2:04
Oh my gosh, that's fantastic. So I have a lot of questions that are coming out of what you just said. So, first of all, can you explain what bipolar one is? And how does that what does that look like from the outside? And how did it show up for you?
Paris P 2:30
Oh, yes, yeah. So for that. So you guys, when you hear about bipolar, there's bipolar one, there's bipolar two and then there's cyclo mania. And for me bipolar one is the manic and depressive and then bipolar two is hypomania. And depressive so more of that manic and then depressive is what showed up in me. So for me, kind of on the outside and what I was trying to do was because I struggled so much with that stigma piece of not feeling ready to talk about these things, or different traumas that I experienced, I really just tried to continue living my life almost with this façade, that everything was okay, right, because I didn't want anyone to be, you know, like, what's going on with her, you know, what do we do with this? How do we help her what's happening here? And I didn't want that situation. So it was kind of hard to see that.
But what was happening with me is I would literally go from, you know, working two jobs at the time being in school and just having endless amounts of energy going, going going and just and then and then having periods where I would just crash and you know, that was the depressive side that really happened from 16 years old. 1718 and then 1819 20. All that time was being being in a manic state right where you're like heightened energy, and I was just doing a lot of things to try to escape from dealing with the situation because I didn't think that I could, I didn't know how to I didn't know how to start those conversations. I didn't feel safe doing that. I just didn't think I should do that. So it was a lot of internalizing things which was really damaging. For me, which led to a lot of just on you know, unsafe things right putting myself in environments that were hurting me trying to just numb things out with drinking sex going different places and doing things that were not productive and not helping me and just continuing to harm me, which is really where that downward spiral started to happen is because I you know, realize is that I didn't really value myself.
And when you don't really value yourself, you really don't care, you know, where you place yourself are all these different things. So I really had to start to gain an awareness of that because I didn't have an awareness of that for a very long time. And once I started to recognize that and say, you know, I'm doing these things that don't make me feel good, that are hurting me, but I'm doing them anyway. And why am I doing this and trying to get to the root of it, and trying to figure that out, and it was definitely a process for sure. But that's really what I love talking about and trying to teach people is just once you gain that awareness that opens up the doors for being able to do the work and start to heal instead of continuing to feel stuck and trapped in that.
Ericka Thomas 5:13
What was the catalyst for you to make a different choice to kind of pull yourself out of that? What was it that really like was triggered in your mind that hey, it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks I need help.
Paris P 5:31
Yeah, so that moment for me was really just being in the hospital and because I was there for two weeks, and it honestly to tell you the truth that felt like years because in that during that time, you know, you just feel like you lose track of time. And it's kind of hard sometimes like to remember exactly all the pieces. Some of it is just kind of blurred but I remember being there and having conversations with everybody on the floor and just hearing people's stories and hearing people's experiences and being shocked by all the traumas that all of these people have lived through and lived with and watching the effects of that on their lives and you know, having people come to me and say, you know, I'm I don't have anywhere to go you know, once I get released from here, I don't have a home, I don't have family, I don't have any of that. And that really instilled something in me that I want to do more to fix the situation because it almost started to that I started to realize like it's a revolving door. You know, I would talk to people and they'd say, Well, I've been hospitalized, you know, 10 times 19 times and I was just really shocked to hear that because my understanding you know at the time was oh you you're hospitalized once you go in, you know you do your treatment, you start to learn how to prioritize this and then you're good you know, everything's great, but that is not the way it works just because you know what happened in my in my situation was that it was very scary. And one of the most horrifying experiences of my life that just really opened my eyes up and I started to say, You know what, I can either continue living the way that I'm living, and this isn't going to get me it's going to get me back feeling sick and low and confused and probably back in hospitalized again.
So I said you know what I can I need to start taking care of myself. I need to start I need to start separating myself from things that I'm doing and you know, people that I'm going around and like environments and all this stuff that I'm using to escape as a distraction, and to actually start talking about some of the traumas I experienced when I was younger, and doing that in therapy and opening up to my family about these things.
And that was what really helped me the most is starting those conversations and continuing those conversations so that I can say you know, I'm not the only one who's stuck in this or has had this and because you do feel isolated and alone feel like you can't connect in that way. So that's what really helped me but yeah, definitely that moment for me a realization was being in that hospital and just seeing how how bad things were there for people that I was round and just even myself coming out of that and actually being more traumatized than when I went in which was not what I thought what happened but yeah, so I'm actually I'm still grateful for it though. I'm grateful. For all the experiences because without them I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing or be pursuing this work or even probably have an interest in this. So I'm actually grateful that, you know, I did go through all those struggles.
Ericka Thomas 8:35
Yeah. And it gives you such a unique perspective. When you turn around and go back into that clinic. As not a patient but as someone who could potentially counsel others, right. You have been there, you've been where they are. And so you can you can help in maybe a different way. You have a different understanding.
Paris P 8:58
Yeah, no 100% And that's really what I saw is that you know, going back and and I was I even remember being around some actually one person who was a roommate of mine when I was in the hospital and I will me wanting to like, like, tell this person like thank you for you know, kind of taking care of me in there and almost being like a mother kind of figure to me, but, you know, feeling like you can't, you can't do that, you know, it's like you have this like you're here you're working here and then kind of having that line of like, wanting to do that.
And I would just see, you know, being around people who are dealing with these things that are similar to what I've dealt with, whether that be bipolar, depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, struggling with these things. It made me so happy to just have that one on one time with this person and hear them and listen to them and give them that space and let them know that I see them and I totally am. Doing everything that I can to assist them as best as I can. Because, you know, I really wish that I had that at a younger age. But I started to realize, you know, we can be that person for ourselves, you know, for able to open up that door and start to take the steps forward, which is going to be difficult and it's going to be challenging, and it's going to feel uncomfortable. But if we can start that work, then it's truly incredible what can happen and you start to realize, you know that you're never going to be in the in the situation that you once were in because you've done so much you know just for yourself and working on that and prioritizing your mental health that you you made it a habit and you're consistent in it. So that's what I you know, I really love teaching people how to get to that place. How do we do that?
Ericka Thomas 10:42
Yeah, so what I'm hearing from you quite a bit what what I'm like underneath some of the things that you're saying is that, you know, a lot of mental illness is you know, how the mind reads what the body has experienced. And you've mentioned a couple of times about traumas that you experienced in childhood and other patients who are in the hospital around you and even the experience of being in the hospital as being traumatizing as well. How strong is the connection? If you know how strong is the connection of traumatic experiences to mental health, mental illness, like depression and bipolar?
Paris P 11:32
Yeah, no, I love that question because you know at least in my my situation I found that's really true because you know, talking about my stuff like sexual assault, right and getting into that topic and sharing and opening up about that, for me was really challenging and very difficult and in my situation is because I really blamed myself and I felt like I can't talk about this because it's and I just would tell myself, you just need to just move on just move on you're fine you're good just move forward. And I was almost in this like cycle of just do this you know distract yourself, schoolwork, this and I was just completely neglecting myself and then finally opening up about that and then you know, having responses, you know from inside my family, you know, that were really negative and just really, really hurtful makes it even harder to do that.
So I totally relate to people who've had any kind of trauma. It's like sexual trauma or just any kind of abuse or something like that in your life or in your childhood and how that can carry if you're not able to discuss it or share it and and I think that's a really interesting thing you brought up of this relationship right with with that stuff and then mental health and then mental illness. And then you know, having these things come up with depression and anxiety because of you know, that experience that's still in the back of your mind and still kind of comes up and whether that be in like nightmares, you're still being reminded of things that have really impacted you and you feel like you can't get it out or communicate it and it's suppressing it. And I feel like when you really think about it that way, you know, it's it makes complete sense. You know how that leads to different struggles inside of yourself and internally because of how you view yourself and then how you start to view the world around you. And I think that when if people are more able to have these conversations and get to that place, and I think it's the start of coming out of that and making it better but it definitely does. It definitely is a challenge and you know,
I'm not going to say like just just go out there and like talk about it because it can be very, very scary. But I would say you know to just have someone that you that you know that knows you well and is supportive and does want the best for you. If you have that person or someone like that in your life, open up to them and start that conversation and start that dialogue because it really does make a difference.
Ericka Thomas 14:03
Yeah, and it's interesting because you're you know, the struggle always is to be able to tell our story. But sometimes the stress response is so activated. It's almost like it hijacks that rational part of your brain when you're trying to explain. It's just so hard to explain. But whatever your experience is, is being you know, read by the body as still happening, right? So it's sending all these signals to your brain that you're still not safe, even if it's something that happened many, many years ago and, you know, rationally that this is not happening now. It doesn't matter. The body's story doesn't always match your story in the moment like the current time and the nervous system can't tell time so it can't tell whether you're, you know, three years old or 10 years old or 25 or 50. Like it doesn't recognize the passage of time. So it's really a fascinating kind of thing that happens. But how can we access that connection, find that reconnection back in through the nervous system. If we're looking to kind of, you know, shift our focus and our priorities and make mental health you know, a higher priority. Where would you start with something like that and what kinds of things have worked well for you?
Paris P 15:41
Yeah, I love that question. I feel like something that has really helped me is getting back to things that I used to do, you know, before the traumas and all these experiences because of that, I stopped doing a lot of things and that was what, you know, the diagnosis of depression at 16 going from, you know, being so active and so outgoing and just involved with all these things, just having no interest and, and just not really understanding why and I feel like now looking back on that I know what's really helped me is just getting back to things that did bring me joy. And I loved I always loved fitness right and getting being active and moving my body but I stopped I stopped just everything for that time and it was like I knew that I wanted to stop feeling the way that I was feeling and to stop having these thoughts that were so overpowering and feeling suicidal and going through that and and wanting to pull myself out of it. But it's almost like you're it's easier to keep going down because you're already down and it's hard to come out of it. So what I really started doing was getting back into running again and walking and just doing these things.
And you know, starting to open up to, you know, people close to me about what was going on and like letting people know because people really didn't fully understand you know, they would notice different you know, people would be like oh, you know, like used to be, you know, like the one who would come up and be funny and now you're like so quiet and you know, I would get stuff like that. And I just wouldn't know what to say back to that. So I feel like for me what really helped me a lot is just getting back to doing those things that I did love and that I did bring me joy. So writing, running an excerpt moving my body again and getting back to doing that instead of just really just allowing my thoughts to continue to like go on in my head and having just so many have that be so negative about my own self and just blaming myself and feeling really bad and just and it was hard to come out of that but doing that by having those things again, and getting back to that and then and then starting that process really helped me a lot and you know I that's what I think is important for people especially when you're struggling so much with something and you do feel alone you know what things do bring you joy, you know, because that because that's sometimes we lose we lose track of that
Ericka Thomas 18:15
we forget absolutely Absolutely. And I think more than that, like you forget who you were. Yeah. And so that makes it even harder to figure out. You know, what is it that brings me joy? What brought me joy before if you don't remember who you were before, then it's it's really it's like you said it's a process and it takes time to get back to that and the body is really an amazing tool. It's an amazing pharmaceutical, it's our own pharmaceutical because it can release all kinds of neurotransmitters and feel good kind of chemicals just naturally just by moving it and so was that something that you noticed a difference with right away when you started to move again? With fitness?
Paris P 19:10
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So doing that really did bring more of that back but I love how you you bring up the point of not remembering who you were before because I definitely had that and almost kind of feels like like who am I? You know who if I don't remember these things, but then when you start to have that again and and moving your body like you sent brings back those feelings of you know, just feeling present because I really just didn't feel that and it's and it's sometimes it is kind of hard to try to like think to go back to that place because it's it feels you know, it's it was like 10 years ago, but I just feel so far away from like all the things that I've had in between and like all the things that I've done to build up from out of that, but I do know you know that movement has been huge, huge for me and just getting back into that because that's always what I love doing is just being you know, running track cross country like move dancing and all that stuff and just finding that again was really a gift because I just didn't have that for so long. And it's it's sad when you when you kind of are in that place for so long and you feel like this is where I have to stay when you don't you really don't.
Ericka Thomas 20:30
Right and your story really beautifully illustrates the idea that you know, nothing stays the same. Nothing has to stay the same. And time moves forward and you will change this moment is not You're not going to feel like this for very long. This moment is not going to last, the next moment will be better and better and and moving forward in that way. But it's hard to see that in the moment. For sure.
Paris P 21:00
Oh, yeah. 100% And that's some other things that helped me to just over over time. And it just I think the important thing to remember is just to be consistent with it, right. So if you're doing so like for me reading books, you know, listening to more podcasts, you know getting around stuff that is uplifting, because I spent so long so far away from that, that it was hard for me to take out a piece of paper and a pen and just list you know, give me three things you're grateful for. I really had a hard time because so much of my focus was on you know things that are in the past or that were really hurtful that I just did not know how to process or come out of and it was just so laser focused on that. And I started to realize that you know from doing these things, you know, getting around more stuff that brought me joy and helped me uplift myself and help me learn to love myself, which was the biggest thing is, you know, we're not taught that. I don't think anyone's ever really taught that.
So and especially when you're trying to recover from, you know, trauma and things like that. I think it's so important to like, learn that you know to learn your your value and to learn your worth and to do things that you know, bring you joy and help you start to you know, come out of that dark cloud that you're you're kind of feeling stuck in. So those things helped me as well just trying to get around more of that and more uplifting. Content and it's really completely over time from doing that. So consistently has made a difference and I really didn't think that it would in the beginning and it's amazing. You know what, what you can do and the resources out there that you can access and to make it part of your daily routine and your habits and just watch over time like that progress. That's that's really
Ericka Thomas 22:52
profound Paris because I think for many people, we fall into this trap of thinking that we are a victim of our feelings, when actually we have so much more agency and control over what it is that we want to feel. And what you're talking about doing is making intentional mindful choices to grow a positive mind to shift your mindset. And there's a book called Growing the positive mind. I don't know if you've read it, it's it talks about gratitude as a part of something that the author calls it the emotional gym where you're actually practicing feeling certain feelings. And he describes gratitude as one of the simplest ones to start with because I think you can just like look around the room and say, Hey, I'm grateful for that pillow, because it's really hard to feel if you if you've never tried this before if you'd if you don't know how much control you have over your feelings. What you want to feel you're not even sure what you want to feel or you're very low it's really challenging to tell someone will just try feeling love for anything that's really difficult, but you could be great. You could just say I'm grateful for my computer that's sitting right in front of me. I don't have to think about it, right. So you start with those tiny little things, and that gratitude actually expands. It's it just expands on itself and really kind of soaks in to everything around you.
Paris P 24:41
Yeah, no, it doesn't. I love that you bring that up because that's so that's something that I found within myself because I remember when I first you know started learning about gratitude and journaling, I remember being like you know, what is that gonna do to like write down that I'm like, what is an I but I was such a pessimist. I was like, so no, like, I was like no to everything. Like this isn't whatever, I'm not gonna try this. But then I'm like, You know what, like, just try you know, do it and then and then I and then as I started doing that I realized that my list was getting longer instead of me being like struggling like, Okay, I'll list three things. And that's the thing to remember is you don't have to be hard on yourself. If you have a hard time with doing that, because it's all on you. It's your time. It's your process. It's your journey.
You don't have to sit there and be like, Oh my gosh, I can't come up with 10 things and taking so long like what you know, and starting to have these thoughts of like why can I list this you know, like it's and just to be easy on yourself and just say you know what I'm grateful for like you said I'm grateful for this pillow, my computer waking up today. You know, having being able to breathe, you know being able to see just there's so much and and you hear it all the time like people say you know, oh, you know I took this for granted and I lost it and now I really miss it. I wish that I had this and I never really appreciated it and we hear this all the time.
But you know if we can start our days like that, and really do that and you know set these intentions for what we want in life and what and how far you've already come like look at how far you've already come in your life instead of being like oh man like you know I should be over here by now right should be you know doing this or all the all these what ifs and these scenarios that you know, can plague our minds. Instead of doing that let's rewrite the narrative and say, Look what I've done or look at the people I've helped or look at the impacts that I've made, and look at how I'm continuing to grow like I'm continuing always to pour into myself so I can be able to pour into others and just recognize that because it's really a great thing. When we can start to have more of that because it does multiply and it does expand. I mean you
Ericka Thomas 26:53
are absolutely right about not being taught how to love yourself. I think that should be the number one lesson in kindergarten. I don't know that they you know, talk I didn't hear anything about self love until I was like 45 years old. You know, like that's, like really ridiculous when you think about it. And especially in a culture like ours that is just dripping with stress and stress triggers and so hypercritical that, you know, we as humans start to kind of embody that critic from outside, and then it takes over and we think that those negative thought patterns are actually coming from us, but I don't think that that's exactly true. Although some neurologist would probably say that's like the default mode network or whatever it is, and it's very nice. I mean, we are wired to the negative, that's a survival thing. But we aren't wired that negative. Sometimes it's like really, really bad. So so the gratitude journal is something that can really start to turn that around, or at the very least, help you start to notice some of that negative self talk before it's snowballs into something else because most of us have lived a certain way for most of our lives and haven't paid much attention to the running narrative. There's through our head and for paid attention to the effect it has on the rest of our body, and our attitude and our emotions and all and our mental health. So what we're talking about here is not neglecting our mental health and including it as part of any other consistent health and wellness routine.
Paris P 28:57
Right? Yeah, exactly. I love the way that you put that because
Paris P 29:00
Because when we do think about it you know like the negative thought patterns that we have or we catch ourselves in and you know what can help with that and like you said, you know bring being able to be more aware of that is huge because when you can recognize that and say, like I just caught this thing that I think a lot that's really mean about myself and then that's huge because sometimes we don't even know like, because if you hear it all the time, I think it's like how many thoughts we have a day you know, all these 1000s of thoughts and you can't consciously like see and have each one. But if you can, if you can pinpoint those, and we're like, wow, like, where does that come from and how to rewrite that because I've had that I've had so many of those and I remember literally, and I know a lot of that comes from the struggles that I was facing inside of myself and finally being able to like, shatter that stigma and overcome those obstacles and talk about these things is really helped me step out of that place and be like, wow, like, I was living like that for for so long. It felt like and, you know, I was thinking that everyone was against me, you know, basically the whole world was against me and that was the way I would live my life you know, waking up and just it's overwhelmed, stressed out, you know, just assuming the worst and everything and it's like you don't even know, you know, these people that you know, you might see in a grocery store and you know, I might be thinking oh my gosh, like, you know, they're talking about me or, you know, this paranoia coming up of people are judging me or they're, you know, doing this. And finally being able to overcome that and it's just opened so many doors for me to do that work on myself and rewrite that story to look at my life now and be like, wow, like look at all the awesome people that I've met and all the great opportunities that I got to have because I taught myself how to value myself again, instead of, oh, you can't do that or no, you know, and it's like when we can do this. It's so great to be able to look back and then say wow, like I want to give this gift to other people.
Ericka Thomas 32:10
Yeah, what you said was so powerful there about feeling like everyone was against you. And those negative thought patterns. You know, the mind is so so powerful. The negative thought patterns that come up like that are actually telling your nervous system that you are in danger. So instead of letting you be present, it puts you in a state of Protection and physically in protection and just waiting for something terrible to happen, right? And that really can soak in to your muscles and your bones and your tissues and, and, you know, changes your heart rate, you get all kinds of other physiological issues going on. And it can it can really kind of snowball,
so I want to bring this a little bit back to fitness and the way fitness can help people. What would you say to fitness instructors, personal trainers, health coaches, wellness educators, folks like that, who are working with the general public? What would you advise them about with regards to mental health and mental illness? And I asked this question because, like a quarter of the people in the United States have had or at least one mental illness diagnosed for them at some point in their life. And in the fitness world, we deal with people and if you deal with, with people, you're dealing with all of their trauma and their baggage too. But not everyone will share their story. with you when they walk in the door, even if it's one on one, for the reasons that you talked about. Already. There's There's stigma and there's you know, you're you're, you don't want to share it's scary to share things like that with someone else. And definitely nobody talks about it in a group setting. So what can you suggest or share with that fitness professional community?
Paris P 34:20
Yeah, I would just say to you know, highlight the benefits that it provides for your mental health because you know, for me, I always noticed you know, whenever I you know, workout and now that it's so consistent, um, that I remember being sick like a while ago and having a cold and not you know, being able to work out for a week and then noticing the fact on my body and just feeling lower and like, just and I feel like you can talk about those benefits of you know, moving your body and getting out and coming together as a group and doing this and having this community in this moment in this class and, you know, uplifting those people and saying, you know, this is what it provides, you know, the benefits of moving your body you know, helping you get out of that, you know, hole that you feel like you're stuck in of, you know, like Oh, and then the benefits of you know, feeling great inside, you know, feeling good after you finish a workout because I don't know about you, but it's I feel like it's been I feel like I haven't heard too many people, you know, do work out and like I feel so bad now. I feel that so no, yeah. So it's like, you do this and you're like, wow, like I'm really happy I did this. You know, I of course, you know, you hear a lot is I wasn't in the mood to go to the gym today. Or I wasn't like, I didn't want to do this. I wasn't in the place to do this, but I did it and I feel so good now and I feel alive. I feel energized. I feel ready to do things and ready to go out there and make things happen.
But yeah, I think it's important just to highlight that and you know, what that could do for your feelings and just how that connects to mental health is how you feel. And if you're feeling you know, down and low and all and just overwhelmed and stressed out, you know, making the time you know, even like trying to do a quick little workout on YouTube or something or, you know, get out and get get a walk in a run you know, just make a little block of time, if you can and just do that, you know, do some jumping jacks, get up do a little dance. Because it really helps it like it makes you smile. You know, I'm like, I don't see a lot of people who dance and who are doing all this stuff and they're they don't look happy. You know that's that's the benefits right? are bringing more this into our life and just making it a habit because over time, it just turns into one and you're like wow, like I never know that I liked working out this much. I never know that I you know, did this as often as I do. And it just it and then you start to see those. It's like a ripple effect.
Ericka Thomas 36:47
So it's awesome. Yeah, and there's so many reasons, like physiological reasons that it helps, how we feel mentally. But I think there's a shift in mindset that needs to happen for people to receive those things. Because I think a lot of times just, you know, the idea of exercise some people just hate the idea of exercise, right? Because it feels like you know, you think it feels like a punishment or something like that. When in reality, any activity where you are moving is actually a gift that you are giving to yourself and if that is if there's only one mindset shift that you take away from discussions like this, when we're talking about self love and reconnecting with this friendly relationship with the body. That should be really high on the list that when you move, you are giving your body a gift, a gift that it's craving. And just like you said, it doesn't have to be a big long thing. It doesn't have to be an hour boot camp. You know, if you're not into that, it can be an easy walk. You know, with your dog or just at dance party after work, you know, in your living room where no one's watching you like it doesn't have to be structured at all. We just want to give the body kind of a release valve really for the tension that it's holding on to from the day. So that's just an easy way to do it. I teach it through trauma release exercise, but that's not the only thing and you know, it's doesn't have to be that complicated. You know, people get hung up on the what like what is it that I should do? And it doesn't it's it's more about that you do something?
Paris P 38:47
Yes. Oh my goodness. I love that and I love how you touched on that piece of you know some sometimes viewing this as a punishment, right? Or like, oh, I have to work. I have to go to the gym. No, you get to go Oh, yeah, you I love that you get to sort of viewing it as like I'm doing this because I don't like the way I look. I'm doing it instead of viewing it as this way I'm doing these things because I don't like this.
Ericka Thomas 39:13
Right? Yes, exactly.
Paris P 39:17
And yeah, like if you can flip that as you're doing this because you love your body and yourself because you know doing this is benefiting you and your body you're doing it because you have that love and appreciation for your body and not I need to lose 20 pounds I need to lose you know as well at 40 I need to lose it's like as many because you start to overwhelm yourself. You're like I need to do this and then when you start to do that and you don't see you know I'm not losing the way and I'm working out and I'm doing it starts to almost demotivate you from doing it.
Ericka Thomas 40:49
Yeah. And and not only demotivate you but it actually triggers things in the body to make you not see the results you're looking for. Yeah, so it will block your results if you do not have a more positive approach to what you're doing. And you can the same thing is true on the flip side of that you can you can multiply your results by changing that kind of approach by doing by by keeping your mindset very, very positive by even if it's just you know, similar to your gratitude journal you create this mantra in your head that says I love exercise. This is wonderful, I feel good. You know, you can change those thought patterns in your head just like we talked about earlier. So yeah, you're absolutely right. I love that. That's That's great. That's great. So, Paris, can you share some resources for people who maybe are listening to this and are thinking well, I'm I'm feeling really, really low or I've got these kinds of symptoms. I don't know what they are and where, you know, where would you send people if they're not sure if they've got some something going on? meant mental health wise? Where should they go first? What do they need to do first?
Paris P 41:21
I think a really good resource for that is NAMI because they actually provide they have classes for its for individual costs for individuals, for families, who are struggling with mental health or not really sure. And just, it's so awesome because they do that and like it's so great to be part of that because you can really learn so much about yourself. That you feel like I don't know what this says, but it feels off. I feel like I might be struggling with depression. I don't know, I'm not sure. So it's a great free resource too, as well. So Nami, they have classes and they're all over the place. So no matter where you live, they have places they do stuff on zooms and zoom classes.
And it's really great because you get to connect with other people who are also you know, also may be may be feeling the same things and starting more of these conversations without feeling like I have to go talk to someone and they're gonna judge me they're gonna think I'm weird or whatever. No you're in a space where people are we're having these talks and these conversations coming up with solutions to this as well. And then, you know, another thing that I would say is, you know, if therapy is an option, I love therapy, and I've always stood by that, you know, I feel like even if you don't have like a huge like life altering thing going on, you don't need to have that to go to be there to be present to, you know, share these experiences, these things that you feel are, you're not sure how to like, process it. You don't know what to do with it, but they're on your heart and to get it out and express that. So I would say that's an awesome resource as well. And then but NAMI is like the best. Yeah,
Ericka Thomas 42:58
so NAMI is National Alliance on Mental Illness, right. Yeah. And that's an easy Google search, but we'll put a link to that site in the show notes for people to Yeah, I'm so glad you mentioned that. That's great. Yeah. I didn't realize they had free classes for people. I think that's amazing. Yes, they do. It's really cool. Nice. So let's talk a little bit about your mission with master your mental your podcast, and I'd love to hear a little of the history of it. Like how that how that podcast was born. And I also like to know what the mental show stands for. So for those of you Okay, so this is audio only so master your mental is mental is an acronym, so hopefully Paris will share with us what that stands for and what that means to her.
Paris P 43:52
Of course, so the reason yeah, so the acronym so we have mental’s an acronym, so it's mindset, engagement, nutrition, talk about it, accountability and love yourself. And those are the pillars. of foundation that got me to start the podcast because you know that back when I started in February of 2020, it was actually called crooked illness. And that is the name of my book that I was writing at the time. That was my story.
And I started the podcast to share my story and to tell my story and to share my experiences, you know, with the struggles with therapy with medications and all this stuff. Because I thought, I'm like, if I can do this, and I can talk about these things, then maybe I can have more conversations, you know, maybe this will help me you know, help other people in some kind of way. I'm not really sure. But I just went for it. I did it. I started it and then being able to connect with with awesome people who come on and share their stories and their experiences, you know, relevant to mindset and mental health and that connection, that strong connection, the two of them have because that's really what I found is the relationship between mental health and mindset. It's so it's such a powerful bond.
Because for me, looking back on the darkest moments I experienced, you know, thinking about that my mindset was just so bad for just like the way that I viewed myself just every day and I'm like, wow, like looking back at that. I'm like, how did it get like that, you know, and then just thinking of, you know, all the things that you can do to prevent that and come out of that is so amazing. So that's really why I started the podcast is to feature more of these conversations and to make this topic of mental health more normalized and less stigmatized, because definitely can be still you know, I get it because you know, not everyone out there knows a lot about it, you know, maybe you maybe certain people, you know, just never grew up with situations or never had conversations about it. So when they see somebody, you know, who's struggling with this, they don't know what to say or how to act or how to do anything or how to help this person.
And instead of you know, getting upset about that I feel like it's important to like, look for the solutions, because I think it's easier to say, you know, to be like, oh, like, you know, people don't care about mental health or it's it's so essential, ugly thing, like no one wants to talk about it, you know, let's focus on something else. But if we can come together and say, you know, what, it doesn't matter if you have a diagnosis or not, you know, because we all have some we've all as humans have had things in our lives that have impacted us whether that be loss, you know, we lost someone close to us. We've been traumatized in some way, or we've had some kind of experience that has really hurt us. Or cut us really deep. We've all had something like that in some kind of a form or another. So I think it's important to have these conversations to help people who feel like they can't have them start to say I'm seeing more of this. I'm seeing more people doing this, so maybe, you know, maybe I can now maybe I can, you know seek out this and because I think that's what makes it better for people as if they're able to see more of this because I really wasn't you know, when I was younger growing up, I didn't see anyone, you know, being like I'm bipolar or I was diagnosed bipolar and now I'm that person.
And I'm, I actually am so grateful for that. Because if I wasn't, and I didn't struggle with that, then I probably really wouldn't have an understanding of what people like that go through or do and I just wouldn't care and it would make me a pretty shitty person because I'd be kind of mean and like, not empathetic or anything because I'd be like, Oh, it doesn't I don't even know about that. But I'm happy I had this and it's kind of a weird thing to be like, I'm happy I was hospitalized but it taught me so much. So yeah, and that's really why I started the podcast is to use my story and to feature these conversations and, you know, to really teach people how to make it more normalized and really tell people shatter that stigma.
Ericka Thomas 48:08
Yeah, and, and I think for so many, so many of us, I think we forget that there's, you know, we have our we have a story that we feel like we are the only one that has that story. It's not exactly true. Right? I mean, we we are unique, each one of us are unique. Our experiences are different, but somebody out there can relate to you. And by doing that, you may have just caused a ripple that will really make a huge difference for someone. So I love that that's part of your mission with master your mental before we wrap where can people find you and connect with you?
Paris P 48:54
Yes, so you guys can find me on Instagram it's master your mental also on Facebook as well master your mental and I would love to connect with you. I always love seeing new friends and everybody on social media and that way so you guys can find me there. And then you can also check out my book as well. It's cricket Elvis, it's lessons from inside and outside hospital walls. And it's that story where all were everything we were covering today, you know, going from that place of coming out of that and I really wanted to, you know, put that into writing to, you know, impact more lives. And help more people who have similar situations or have struggled in any way with their mental health. So, yeah, this is awesome.
Ericka Thomas 49:36
Great. That's great. Okay, so Paris, tell me what you are doing these days to work in? What is your work in these days?
Paris P 49:47
I love that question because it's there reminds me of the the what when I asked you, I love that. So for me I love working in on myself. What I'm doing is really continuing to be present and be present and continue to grow and build and prioritize my mental health by moving my body by doing my gratitude. And those are the two fundamental pieces that really helped me and that's what I do to continue this right to stay consistent with it and to continue to care for myself and pour into myself and do that so that way I can be able to do that for everybody else. Because you know if we don't do it for ourselves, and we are you know, pouring into our own cups, how do we how do we really do that for anyone else? So that's what I'm really doing to try to work in all myself is having that consistent gratitude moving my body no matter what it is getting out getting a walk, going to the gym, doing a little dance, all the things,
Ericka Thomas 50:45
all the things beautifully said thank you, Paris. Thank you so much for being here today. It's been great, awesome.
Ericka Thomas 20:54
Awesome. And really, really a lot of helpful information and I want to thank my listeners. So if you if you like what you heard and you or someone you know is looking for mental health support, please please reach out for help. You'll find links to all the information and resources we discussed today in the show notes including Paris's free Facebook community, her gratitude journal and of course her book. And the simplest way to get your hands on all of those things is to visit elemental kinetics.com/the-work-in/ and while you're there…
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