Unsexy Selfcare with Jo Bregnard of the Selfcare Sanctuary
Holding hands
Transcript
Welcome back - we are in the middle of a series on Burnout this month and it isn’t enough to be aware of it or complain about it without offering some practical ways to avoid it, to heal and recover from it and maybe protect ourselves from it in the future. Today's guest is going to help us with that.
Jo Bregnard is a consummate caregiver with a muti-faceted wellness experience and her story will touch your heart and maybe inspire you to look at how you do self care in a different way. Jo was touched by breast cancer in 2002 and knows from experience how hard it is for those who tend to others--as part of their careers or as personal support for friends or family members--to find the same attention for themselves. She helped nurse her husband through a serious burn injury and unexpected cardiac complications, she cared for her mom after her Alzheimer's diagnosis in 2016, and now she watches over her elderly father.
Jo's story is not unique and it’s one that we can all learn from. Jo has been sharing yoga as one of many self care modalities as an instructor since 2015 And today she offers everyday self-care experiences through her online studio from her homestead in Southern Vermont. Where she lives with her husband, a menagerie of critters including 2 pet cows, Lou lou and Blossom.
For fitness professionals who are always on the go, always trying to be better at their job, you’d think integrating self care to avoid burnout or help us recover from the physical demands of our career would be a no brainer. Unfortunately just like with so many others who work in helping professions, we tend to be last on our own list if we make it on at all. And this leads to the inevitable physical, mental and emotional burnout and chronic stress that borders on self-traumatizing. It’s so common in the fitness industry it’s almost a right of passage.
Jo has extensive background in many different self care practices and that’s what we’re going to explore today. She believes that self care is essential to give our bodies and souls the support they need so we can continue doing the things that bring us joy and connection.
So let’s start our Work IN with Jo Bregnard
Thank you Jo and welcome. I'm so excited to have you on the work in today. So thanks for being here.
Jo Bregnard 0:11
I am honored that you asked me to be here, thank you so much Erica.
Ericka Thomas 0:15
All right, so let's dive in today. Can you share a little bit of your personal hero's journey with us. I would love for our audience to get to know you a little bit better.
Jo Bregnard 0:29
Sure, of course. Yeah so I think probably started when my husband had his burn injury that was in 2002, year after we got married, we both worked at, like departments town like departments, and he was a field worker and was burned very severely he was not electrocuted or anything but he was out working in the field and have this really frightening burn injury which caused him to be in the hospital, multiple weeks. First, you know, dealing with this if you've never known anybody that has had a burn injury, it is so different from the trauma that comes from like a car accident, or some of that stuff in terms of the actual physical injury, and also mentally and emotionally the sort of things that it that it does to you. So, this was all new for me I spent a lot of time in the library of the hospital there educating myself on on how all of this stuff works. But he went through that, and was home in between a series of surgeries to physically release. The contracted scars that form after burn injury. And that was in September, and we were walking around our yard, you know, looking at all the stuff that had been neglected over the past couple of months because we had been back and forth, you know, to the hospital and home, and I was speaking with him and gesturing to myself to my heart with my fingertips, and I talked with my hands and I felt a lump in my breast, and I thought oh I can't deal with us right now I'm sure it's nothing. I'll deal with it later and I waited a couple of weeks, and did go get it checked out and it turned out to be breast cancer. So, here we were my husband's still recovering, you know, home but recovering and now here I am heading into the hospital myself. So, thankfully. It was a pretty easy road comparatively for me, for my mastectomy, and I did have chemotherapy, and as I'm going through it I was thinking, this is, again, I use that word this is kind of easy compared to having to take care of him. When my husband came home. You know they do send you home with a nurse and, and physical therapy and things are happening, but there was a lot of times that I was the one actually doing dressing changes and applying medication and certainly giving out dosing medication, and after like, I know I'm not really sure how to do this but it was the kind of thing where, well it looks like you know what you're doing so keep you're doing a great job he's doing great. You're doing great. Keep going, but here I am finding myself in, like, a role of a nurse, which I had never done before. And so compared to that, taking care of me. I could do that like that was easy that was doable. So we both recovered well from our, our individual situations. I really at that point dove into my yoga practice very physically. You know I loved my Two Day hot yoga practices, level two, three, you know, I was proud of that, you know how many workouts can work definitely the workout, could I get in and day and I burned off a lot of energy there and it was great, you know, it felt good to sweat and do all that stuff. And then, you know, pretty much, with all that other stuff in the rearview mirror and this being my new life and starting training and some of that stuff. It was a huge shock when in 2010. Again, my husband ended up in the hospital. Turns out he had been having some silent heart attacks. He ended up with a valve replacement and a quadruple bypass, which was pretty major, but the real
whammy came when he was supposed to come home, and he started developing all these complications, and there was one evening where he was coding and couldn't get out of this really dangerous rhythm in his heart. So they finally were able to stabilize him he has a implanted AICD device a defibrillator device, and everything is fine now. And he's has not had a problem since then. It was probably just a fluke from the surgeries and things like that but it was really scary again to be tossed right back into that, that situation of caring for somebody. And so, again, it's like, each of these things wrapped up everything's okay and I think we're on our way. And my practice sort of changed and now I'm in had completed teacher training and learning a little bit more of the subtleties of the practice, which is what I really needed after his heart condition, much less physical and much more about taking care of myself emotionally and mentally, but then my mom got diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and that was challenging, because they live in another state, I've moved since then, as well but traveling back and forth being in one state to travel, and then care for my mom, and then travel back and a lot of times you know there, I'd be driving back to my home and I check in with my dad and things wouldn't be right. So I'd have to turn around and head back, or head back the next day I was lucky enough to get FMLA time family medical leave from work from my full time job. But it was, it was challenging. During that time, so that's when, as I found myself heading toward burnout, you know, we've been talking about burnout, Erika. Finding myself like a hamster on a wheel, not knowing whether I was coming or going. Certainly not noticing like anything around me, the only way I knew, like Time was passing or things were changing around me was when did I have to turn on my headlights, like was there earlier in the drive or was, or maybe I got to turn them off because now that I was staying later Later, you know I had my list and I was doing all the things and I was so accomplished and feeling so good and meanwhile, like my soul was shrinking, you know I was losing myself. And so that's when I decided I need to make some big changes for myself. There was no way that I could fit in a practice, like, I didn't have the energy, first of all to like to do a practice I would stay over until at night I would always say it before I go to bed, I'm going to do a practice or when I get up in the morning I'll do I'll do something. I was, I was just exhausted, you know, I couldn't get to sleep. You know that's normally how that thing goes you're so tired that you can't get to sleep, and I just to find something along my, my route to like do the research to find a studio to go to like it was all just, it was not going to work, so I had to find practices that I could incorporate into my day to little practices because I didn't have time for anything big, to, to help myself bridge these gaps between, you know what was going on with me because I was not functioning optimally. So that's, that's how I ended up, you know, making these practices work for me and then start just starting to share them with other people who I could see, given my experience that they were going through something similar.
Ericka Thomas 7:57
Yeah, so you have this beautiful, this, this, this beautiful vision now because you have experienced both sides of the coin, and in multiple ways. And so, you are in a unique position to be able to speak to, you know, both people who are, who need care and those who are giving care. So how important is it for both caregivers and those that are going through serious health challenges, to understand their stress response in those in those moments.
Jo Bregnard 8:37
Well, that's, I think that is everything. And you you teach this so well I think. And, of course, when you're in that acute situation where you've just gotten a diagnosis or something's just happened. A car accident something major has just happened. It's probably the last thing you're thinking of because of course you know you we need to heal the body what you know what are the things that we need to do physically to take care of ourselves, but it's not that long after, and maybe even at the same time that we need to address what's going on with ourselves mentally and emotionally as well that I find that the person being cared for, gets a lot of attention. You know of course from the, the health care team. Other family friends asking How's you know how's the person, you know, in my case, how's my husband How's your mom, which is great, it of course that's our main focus that's we want to make sure that those people are cared for. But what ends up happening and what's reinforced in the caregivers mind is well I'm just secondary well I don't really matter and it's all really all about this other person, and I can hear it in the language and I can, I caught myself in the, what I would do physically during the day and how everything was all of my emotions and all of my activities were outward and giving instead of any, any sort of receiving or even quiet or even neutral time where I was not giving. So, when you start to see little patterns like that I think that's when it becomes clear that, okay, something might be missing here and I need to address this other part of me that's not just physical. And again it is both the person being cared for and the person doing the caring the team doing the caring,
Ericka Thomas 10:29
yeah. Yeah, that's interesting. Okay, so when you're talking about incorporating small self care practices, let's, let's back that up a step. And can you describe for us or explain what exactly is self care, like just break it down, like, we don't know exactly what it
Jo Bregnard 10:53
is. I think we kind of don't know exactly what it is right. A lot. And I think it does mean different things to different people. So I think it helps to talk about it. So as a caregiver, especially where the, as I mentioned the, the action is one person doing something to care for somebody else to mate help the other person with their basic needs. That's the same sort of thing that we're turning towards ourselves toward back toward toward our own body, set of emotions and mental health as well. A lot of times self care has been discussed or wrapped around physical things, taking a bath, getting a manicure, going on a vacation which are all. Luckily, they're not necessary. There are lots of people that don't like any of those things. But the, they are very small parts in a much bigger hole because what I think it comes down to is not just the physical, but also that emotional piece and the mental health piece the nervous system, what can make our nervous system feel calm, because most of the time as a caregiver, you're in that state of vigilance and being hyper aware. I really felt like when I when I'm in, you know, acute caregiving mode which I'm not right now my mom passed in January, but I'm actually about to go into it because my husband's having knee surgery next week so I'm gonna get to put all this in practice again. But what ends up happening is you live two lives as a caregiver, you live your life, which is doing the caring, but you're also doing all of the thinking and the organizing and everything else for that person you're caring for because they maybe can't do it for themselves. Now when I was taking care of my mom. That was in spades right because when she was, you know, toward the end, even not able to communicate and everything, you know, all of that, I had to make my decisions for me and decisions for her too. So think about that, you know, sometimes we'll talk about a job and we'll say geez I was doing the work of two people, you're like, living two bodies, you're living in two bodies when you're caring for somebody, and times it by, if you're a school teacher, all the kids in your class are healthcare worker all the patients that you're caring for. So,So that's exhausting.
Ericka Thomas 13:30
Yeah, absolutely. And I think. Yeah and I think, I think we don't give that enough credit. Like, what I mean that what you were just describing I mean, that is not the first thing I think of when I think of caregiving I think of just the physical actions of taking care of somebody, But you're absolutely right, those decision making processes and, you know keeping track of all the appointments and the that what to what to take when you know all of the pharmaceuticals that might be involved or, or things like that. And it's, it's, can be overwhelming that pressure, you know, is going to get overwhelming. And so when you recognize that you need the same type of attention, but you're exhausted already, I mean it's going to, it's very difficult then to turn it around and now you have to take care of you to, like, that is, that's like a third person. So, what how do you figure out what it is that you need. Because I think for. I know in my experience, that's a little bit tricky sometimes, it's, it's really personal, like, it sounds to me from what you just described, you know, self care can look different for everyone, if it's, if it's not going to the spa, then it's going to be something very, very different. It doesn't have to be anything big, it can be very very small but sometimes it's hard to know if you're the one that needs the care what counts as care for you, like what is it that is going to feel like care, and then what is it, or I should say this a different way. Are you able to receive what are you able to receive as care.
Jo Bregnard 15:24
Oh, you said so many good things right there. Okay, let's see if I can remember how I want to say this. So, the way I the way I self care the way I do self care is very unsexy. it is not as sexy or as like luxurious as a bubble bath or a manicure or a vacation. And I think it all counts as self care. And that's why, you know the language thing gets a little tricky because like you said, I think we, we throw out this term and and maybe it's different. What I think self care is is different from what you think to what somebody else thinks. And, and it changes it can change it can change for what we might need at any given time, but I think what it comes down to, for, for most people is getting quiet, even just for a few moments to see what you need. I found myself being the most proud of myself as a caregiver, doing caregiving really well when I had my list and I was checking things off and I was getting it all done and everything was going great and a lot, I have a sort of a ritual, a very routine but bordering on ritual with what I used to do, traveling down and then traveling back to see my mom, and it included and I thought these things were self care and they were at the, at the beginning, it included me stopping at my favorite vegan bakery on the way to get something for me and to get stuff from my folks and stopping, then at the natural food store to pick up groceries for them, and also to make sure that I had something for dinner so I was like, This is me taking care of myself. And that is absolutely true. Those are things that I did that I built in to my schedule to make that happen, but there would be times that I would be on this, like, doctors schedule a 15 minute increments to make sure that I hit all these places I needed to stop along the way. And as I did it I would check them off and I'd be so proud of myself. And then it started to become too much, right, it started to tip over into this is me just like creating more work for myself sometimes. Yeah, I think it is becomes a fine line. So, when instead, or in addition, I could sit in my car for five minutes before going into the grocery store. Just sit for five minutes. I realized, first of all, I usually had a better shopping trip, I didn't forget anything. I was a little more present. I wasn't on my phone, you know, doing 12 Different things while I was trying to pick up groceries, and my mood was better. I could feel my heart rate come down, it kind of set up the whole, the whole rest of the evening, if I took the time to do that. And that also let me look around and go, Oh, geez, it's still laid out oh wow it's not you know, look at those leaves turning it's really beautiful right now, because I was noticing none of that because I had my list, you know. And I think what this speaks to is the idea of not necessarily adding things to be self care, but maybe looking at taking things away.
Ericka Thomas 18:48
Interesting.
Jo Bregnard 18:49
Yeah, and instead of, you know, like I said, looking for a class to do, looking for a practice to do. Oh, it's good if I read a book, oh it's nice if I use some essential oils, those are all lovely things but if they become another thing you have to do. You might not do it, and it's, and the self care is not self care if you don't do it, it's just not happening.
Ericka Thomas 19:12
Yeah, so I just want to highlight something that you brought up there that that five minutes of just being still, of doing nothing basically except being is a really critical activity, even though you're not doing anything, but it's a critical activity for recovery for the nervous system, and there's actually some studies out there that, that people are starting to integrate this kind of five minutes of nothing. At the end of, you know, athletic practices for professional athletes, so that their nervous system can recover as well as their physical muscles in their bones from their from their training, right, and this is becoming more and more, well understood that if we don't recover at the level of our nervous system we aren't really recovered. So, by incorporating something like stillness in, you know, throughout your day or you know at the end of an actual yoga practice or something like that it gives your nervous system time to come down so that you can think more clearly, so that you can be more present with the people around you, because with that highly activated hyper vigilant nervous system, your thinking brain is disconnected from reality from what's going on around you and that is really a missing piece to a lot of missing understanding I would say, not a missing piece, it's a missing understanding of why we would want to do self care, right, why we would want to include include one more thing for us to do.
Jo Bregnard 21:06
Right. You know, and you make, that's, that's so true and and wonderful. And the thing that, because I was, I was having my head what somebody who's who doesn't want not they don't want to do this with somebody who says, oh, no, it's just too selfish of me I still need to take care of somebody else. By tape by you taking that five minutes, you will walk into that situation. Now in this case it would be me showing up at my parents place, You walk into that situation, not just looking for the things to check off your list, you know, doo, doo, doo, you'll be looking your senses will be heightened. I'll be able to notice, how's my mom really look today in her face. Am I seeing a little sense of worry today. Am I hearing my dad, you know, say, in between the words that he's speaking that he's struggling a little bit more this week than he was last week. You know those are easy things to miss if we're otherwise preoccupied with the buisiness and everything else. So by taking a little bit away or not doing anything. Yeah, we can start to see that stuff and you raised a good point. In your solo episode about recovery, and, and, you know that shavasana time or the the end of your workout taking that time, and how many people resist that they want to you know put more activity in that. And it's a practice for us to learn how to do that right, you know, the big joke is oh I love my yoga practice I do, you know, an hour Shavasana. The average person really doesn't, or wouldn't do that, Because it's hard for us to think and realize how important that is for us. So, if even five minutes sounds really daunting, and like too much, you know, start with one breath, you know, 30 seconds. And yeah, and, you know, it takes time to drop into that but if you're, if you're feeling that you're finding yourself, you know, there are ways to ease into that the other thing too is just to sit, some people have trouble sitting, say with their eyes closed, or and not moving. So maybe, you know, keep your eyes open and notice the thing, all the things around you that you haven't been able to notice because you've been so busy. So there are different ways to do it.
Ericka Thomas 23:29
Right, right, and it just takes a little bit of experimentation, you know, every, every, every day is going to feel a little bit different I think for people, for sure. Definitely. and I will just say in my own experience, there have been, you know, in the fitness industry I think it's, it's really kind of a difficult place to have a career if you're, if you're looking for balance. It's kind of like, you go hard. Every time you step in front of the class, because it isn't for you. And so we tend to get wrapped up in this idea of this workout is 110% of myself that is for you. It isn't a workout that I would do for myself, but I'm gonna do it for you. And even knowing, like, in, in my history in in the fitness industry. I knew, and I had been told by other instructors throughout the years that it's so important to do something for yourself. Right. We hear that a lot, right, you're going to, you need to do something for yourself because all of these workouts, what you do for your job that's for them. Right, so that makes sense. But I chose what I chose to do for me, added another layer of definitely physical stress, even though I mean I chose running because it was something that I didn't have to think about like it wasn't choreographed It wasn't hard. There was a lot of brain work involved with putting one foot in front of the other. And when I was in those, those moments when I was running. It felt like moving meditation so mentally it felt really good. I never used music or anything like that but physically, the volume of physical training that that brought on top of what I was already doing was too much for my body, this story that my body was telling me, was that this is too much in my, my head I was like, but this is what I do for myself. So what do you say to that we and you touched on this a little bit you know with the list and you know like, you're gonna check off this list and you're doing these things on the list that are technically for you. Right, but they end up being too much and too overwhelming. So, how do people choose a balanced bit of self care, like what creates balance for the nervous system, when we're looking to bring in those little moments of recovery.
Jo Bregnard 26:20
So we've already talked about how it's, it's challenging because we're always changing. Every day we feel different and because some days that run that you are taking might be like exactly what you need. And then there are some days that you're maybe, maybe not really what you would choose to do but I do this, this is the thing I do for myself so I'm going to do it. So maybe I'm one of those days where it's not really the activity you would pick out of the hat to do, maybe on that, on one of those days, you try something else and just tell yourself I'm just going to do this this one day, we tend to say like, that's it I'm not going to run anymore. And then, you know, that's a huge shift, you know, change and it becomes overwhelming. Nobody ever says everything's all or nothing. On this day, I'm going to try instead of running I'm going to try walking, you know, the, the mental I still have the one foot in front of the other I still have the no music and sort of being able to, as much as you can empty your mind, but it's a little less on my body. So changing things just slightly, sometimes it can be, it's that I, you know, that idea of titration can be just enough that it might be just what we need in that day, and that the idea of getting quiet, will help us, if, if you have a practice of getting quiet practice, which is a moment or two here and there that will allow you to learn what your body feels like because so many times, for those of us in professions or in roles where we're taking care of somebody else, whether that's as a health care caregiver or a personal caregiver, or you're standing up in front of a class. Again, all of that energy is outward, you have no idea how your body actually feels.
Ericka Thomas 28:17
Oh my gosh, that's huge, right, it's, there's a level of dissociation where you kind of almost have to cut off what's happening in your body so that you can be completely focused on outside. And it sometimes doesn't come back online without, without some effort, or some attention paid to it. And that's huge because if you don't notice what's happening inside of you. How can there be any trust, like the between that body and mind we lose that, that trust and it's that can be so physiologically detrimental and lead to all kinds of other health issues.
Jo Bregnard 28:57
Well, I mean it's it's a known phenomenon that people, you know, work themselves so hard, because they know they have this two week vacation, you know, Once a year, they go on vacation they get sick, they get a cold or flu, you know, instead, can we, and I'm, you know, we're not talking about an hour long practice we're talking a few minutes at a time, maybe a couple times a day to just check in and see how you're feeling and it's that it's becomes a practice again and then the body and the brain learn that okay this is what I do I check in, I see how I feel, you know, this is me feeling okay this is me feeling like I need to rest. And then, you know, the next step would be honoring that.
Ericka Thomas 29:41
Yeah, which is hard. Yeah, so, so let me follow up with that rest, that, that idea of what rest is because I think, also, that is, that's a little sticky sometimes, especially if you're, if you're type a hypervigilant, or just one of those people that has to go, you know 110% All the time has to be physically moving all of the time, how do we really learn what real rest feels like. And looks like, and that what what we can, again, receive as rest over.
Jo Bregnard 30:27
So, you know, we, some of us going back to the example about the having the two weeks and getting sick, some of us say Oh, I see I do rest. What I do is I work really hard and maybe once a week or once a month, oh I then I have my Netflix binge, and so then I collapse on the couch, yeah for a weekend, and then that's my rest so that's how I'm gonna rest. That's how you know, physically, that's great, it's great you probably have your feet up and that's wonderful and maybe you know mentally it's giving your mind a break and it's nice to like reading, have a story to go into that's not our own story, but, you know, really, is that probably the best thing that we can be doing. I would never take that away from myself, or from anyone else completely. But what else you know we, it's nice to sort of play around with some other ways that we can try rest. So for some people, you know, rest looks like Boston, or a restorative class where there's a set amount of time that you have your favorite props around you supporting you. But so.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
Jo Bregnard 0:04
Rest, remember we need to like let the mental part go to when I think when we talk about, for example going to sleep. There's a very common thread for a lot of these people that, as I mentioned, you get into bed and then you can't sleep. Yes, it's the only time you have physically gotten quiet all day. And so your mind is going to keep going. And, you know, we talked about, well, I need to shut my mind off well your minds, doing what your mind does. But can you teach yourself, you know, emotionally and mentally, not to turn off because we can't do that. But to maybe set aside and I, what has worked for me in a variety of visualizations, is this idea of like carrying bundles, like luggage and like I've just gone to the store and I have all these packages, and then what that be and what maybe walking along way and how you be tired, and then what it's like to set those things down, and how that feels, and they're still right there, they're right next to me and I'm going to pick them up, when my strength has resumed, and I'm ready to pick them up but I sometimes if I'm having trouble at night. Turning, turning things off to rest. I tried to use that visualization of setting things down. And, you know, sleep is challenging and so rest for people is different. There are people that love their naps during the afternoon, and they, they build time in for that or I don't know, on a weekend or whatever and that becomes something they really look forward to, there are other people who would never be caught dead napping, like that, I just don't do it, it's, you know, not something you should do, because it means you're being lazy. Right. But it doesn't need to be. It doesn't need to be anything that anybody's ever told you, it can be just, it can be just a few minutes of sitting down.
Ericka Thomas 32:10
Yeah, and I loved, I loved that was a beautiful embodied practice that you just described, about, you know, putting those packages down. And I think that's a that's a wonderful idea, because you can always pick them back up again, it's like, okay, we hold on to ideas or thoughts or problems that are running around in our head, and before you know it, your fists are actually tight, because you're mentally and emotionally holding on to things. The body is really really sensitive to that. Whether you know it or not, are aware of it or not. And so, at a moment like when you're trying to sleep if you can mimic the physicality of hey I'm holding on to my day. Let's just loosen my grip on the day. Let's just put these things down, and then in the morning I'll pick them back up, It may be really helpful for people to do something like that to practice something like that. And, you know, when we talk about rest. I often think about the difference between surrender and collapse. And if we want to rest. I mean, yes, you could just collapse into it. But if it's more intentional, like, I'm going to surrender, right now, into this space for just a moment. It's less, there's less of a stress trigger in my mind around that like this I am choosing this, I'm not pushed to the edge, and now I have no other choice, right I am choosing to let down a little bit, and then I will be more energetic. When I get up, right. And if exactly what you said doing these things, more often during the day giving ourself these smaller moments. It's not just practice for us, but the nervous system recognizes that as replacement. It's a replacement reaction to any kind of reactivity, any, any type of activation in the in the nervous system so we're actually practicing, bringing ourselves back down multiple times during the day, it's so, so important to practice that it isn't about being in rest or being an activation it's the difference between the two. It's being able to let yourself come down, it's being able to come back up. That's where resilience lives.
Jo Bregnard 35:08
Right, right, and I mean this isn't like some new concept right Paul Davis talks about this too in bringing in little activities during the day so. And the thing about collapse, too, is going to like coming out of collapse. It takes a lot more energy. Right then, if you just okay for a few minutes, this is what I'm going to do I'm going to sit here quietly, you know, instead of having it be a complete breakdown, which sometimes we need that too but instead of driving yourself to collapse. What are the practices, I've been working with this time of year, you know, the leaves are starting to fall. And this is a time seasonally of release, which can be hard for many of us, you mentioned the fists, you know, white knuckling it, and, you know, embodying release before going to bed. I've been working with this practice of. If I'm noticing I have my fists, you know, my arms are alongside me on the bed. Can I just open my hands a little bit and allow whatever is there to sort of evaporate off my hands, um, you know, I, I've been talking with my members in my studio, about the fact that the leaves, don't push, I mean the trees don't push the leaves off the edge of the ends of the branches, they just let them, let them go. They just, it's a gentle release so it doesn't need to be this big forceful, anything we do doesn't need to be a big forceful practice, but just something really gentle, to let the natural flow of the energy happen without forcing it. You could the last thing we need to do it for something else in our life.
Ericka Thomas 36:56
Oh Exactly. Absolutely. So, alright, we've already talked about a couple of ideas of that we could use for moments of self care throughout the day. What is your favorite self care practice personally, and then maybe could we think of a couple more that we could give to the listeners that they might be able to do, wherever they are.
Jo Bregnard 37:21
So I have this foundational practice that I tried to do several times a day, and it, you know they're these are also simple I wish they were and sometimes I wish they were more complicated so that they'd be fancy and everything but they're not they're just really simple, and it's a weird awareness to your hands and your feet, and I like to sort of check in with myself, not at the same time or in the same orientation every time because it gives you really cool feedback so for example, I'm standing as I'm talking to you and I'm standing on one of those nice surfaces for a standing desk so it's got some patterning and grooves and stuff on it. So to do this practice, you could close your eyes or soften your gaze as you do this, but noticing the soles of my feet, what are the soles of my feet contacting right now and for me, for example, right now my left foot has some ridges underneath it, because that's where I happen to be standing, and the right ones very smooth it's on a very smooth surface, but my right toes are on something that's a little group, so I'm really dropping all my awareness right down into my feet. Something I'm countless times a day the surface under our feet changes, and we feel different things and we never even notice it. So dropping way down into your feet, and then your hands and sometimes I'll do this. My favorite time to practice is in line at the grocery store, because you can do lots of things without anybody knowing what you're doing, but if you're sitting holding on to the items that you're going to buy you can feel your hands on the surfaces of these items, and it just gives you a sense of place and purpose, where I am, what I'm doing, maybe thinking about okay I'm buying these things to head back home to take care of my person. Or maybe these are gifts for somebody. And it really allows you to like zero in on exactly what's going on in your life that sort of allows you to take a big picture, as well as really honing in closely on very focused, parts of your body. That's one of my favorites, and you can sort of, it's a training thing as you mentioned, you can sort of do it quickly during the day you can check it like sort of check in with yourself maybe while you're cooking, what am I doing right now where are my hands and my feet, and taking a couple breaths and noticing what they're doing. That's one of my favorites. But in terms of like larger practices, the, the thing I'm most enamored with right now is acupressure, and I love that it's, it does the same has the same benefits on the body as acupuncture, which, you know, so many studies have been done about how it has helped with pain and and stress and things like that. But we don't need to be as specific, and a lot of where acupressure has come from, is because we have put our hands on our body to support ourselves and to comfort ourselves in a very natural way. And this is really building on that, and I learned as I'm studying this, all the different ways I've been doing this for years and who knew that this was actually helping me and one of my favorites is one I do constantly which is to put my hand on my heart. And I like feeling my palm. On my sternum there. And, you know, my eyes just naturally want to close when I do that, and I can feel myself breathing into that space. That is something I come to time and time again I catch myself doing it when I get news that is maybe a little difficult to to take in, I find my hand naturally going there, when somebody surprises me and does something very loving my hand will go there and so as you start to notice these patterns in your body it's like your body knows what's going on and why not take that practice when you need that feeling and that sense of nourishment support, and maybe your hands not naturally going there now, but what would it be like to put your hand there and see how that feels. So, I just love that one.
Ericka Thomas 41:42
I like it too, it never would have occurred to me that this would be enough. It reminds me of Garuda mudra though, you know like Yes Right, right. And, and that to me feels like you're giving yourself a hug and. Yeah, it's funny, so for those of, I mean this is audio only so just a , just to refer, that's just placing your hands on your heart. Just, just placing your hand on your heart, or a little bit higher, maybe next to your collarbones fingers on the collarbone, something like that so yeah that's beautiful and easy enough to kind of redirect your attention. Very simple redirect your attention from, you know all of the stuff that's swirling around outside of you, and then just bring yourself back into the body. For a moment, and by that time it was beautiful
Jo Bregnard 42:33
Thank you. Thanks. Um, yeah those practices, I love them because you can do them in a Zoom meeting and nobody really thinks that you're doing and you know what I mean yeah, you might need somebody might have just said something that, that stung you a little bit well took you to put your heart there you have your hand there on, you know, on top of your heart or, you know that. The other thing that can happen in a Zoom meeting is if you, if you start to find yourself daydreaming and going off everywhere that dropping into your feet and your hands and like I feel like it's like a push pin on the map and you're saying I am here, here I am right in this spot. So, yeah, so many great paths,
Ericka Thomas 13:15
I love that the push pin I need that sometimes
Jo Bregnard 43:18
we all do yeah we all do and you're right, you know, it's almost like you can envision or feel this field around you have all of your anxieties and things you're trying to think about, you know the dinner, you have to make to the right, you know all the all the different things, and it, and, and then again too, because you will eventually have to go back to some of those things, if your family is going to have dinner that that evening, but at least you can come at it with a little more clarity and a, you know, coming at anything in a heightened state isn't good for anybody and probably means you'll be scattered as you're doing it so
Ericka Thomas 43:54
yeah and that you know if you, if you're thinking I like to think of, of, you know, working our way through the stress response as navigation, right, and if you're going to navigate anything, if you're going to use a roadmap to navigate anything you have to know where you are to begin with. And, and if you, you know, just put that push pin of yourself into the map where you are, it's so much easier to make your way right you're, you're moving from this centered grounded place, and, and while it may be a rough crossing. At least you have that anchor there, right, you have that anchor within yourself. So that's, that's absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing that Jo. This has been an amazing conversation. You are a beautiful soul, Jo, thank you so much for joining me today. Let's take a moment I would love it if you would share what you've got going on in your online studio and where can people find you, how can we connect with you.
Jo Bregnard 15:02
Yeah, no, this has been wonderful, thank you so much Ericka. Yes, so my online studio the self care sanctuary, and it's a monthly membership that people can join that we do a variety of practices live classes in a variety of styles both activating as well as relaxing, and then we have a library of recordings with these shorter off the map practices, practices these real quick, things like similar to what we talked about today. acupressure self massage ways you can rest off the mat things that you can do for practices to take you between the times of the live classes which the live classes were so popular last year, right, but now we're moving back into a new normal and that may change a little bit, so the doors will probably be opening to that again sometime in. After January. And in terms of staying in touch with me. My studio is Studio.Jo.bregnard.com, that's where you can find the studio, there's some free content there, there's a free five day mini self care retreat that does some of these quick and easy practices and there's a bonus longer restorative practice that sometimes if we do have time to do a longer practice that's on the mat with props and things like that, it's nice to have resources to go to to grab, when, when we have the time to do that right the time and the energy, so you can find that at Studio dot job right now.com I'm on social everywhere as Joe Grignard Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, yeah and I'd love to stay in touch with people it's this is so wonderful Erica you have such great content and wonderful guests on all the time so I hope it was helpful.
Ericka Thomas 46:52
Thanks Jo. I know it was and all of those links are going to be in our show notes. So, I will post those for people to check out. And I want to thank our curious listener as well, for joining us today, and if you like what you heard, and you or someone you know wants to reach out and connect with Joe, you can find all the links in the show notes and the simplest way to get to those is to head over to elemental kinetics Comm, forward slash that dash work dash in and while you're there check out the free resources for a growing movement of fitness professionals, bringing a new gold standard of instruction to the fitness industry, trauma sensitive confident, creative class design within your scope, and without the burnout for you and your health conscious clients, thanks again everyone and I will see you next time.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
I’m Ericka
I’m your highly caffeinated host, course creator and entrepreneur has over 2 decades of experience as a fit pro with a certification collection that includes registered group fitness, RYT, trauma release exercise among others.
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