Making money your freedom, safety and female empowerment with Sandy Connery
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Money mindset from Marvelous coach and co founder Sandy Connery
Transcript
Sandy Connery transcript
Ericka Thomas 0:00
For the last six weeks we've been discussing multiple aspects of mindset as it relates to the fitness industry and solopreneur ship. And that includes things from the foundation of knowing who you are and your core beliefs as a foundation for your business choices and decisions. All the way to impostor syndrome, shiny object, objects and syndrome, self promotion and money mindset. And today, I wanted to introduce you to someone who has been a mentor and a coach to me and many of my colleagues over the past several years as we navigate the shifts in the fitness industry to online business. Sandy Connery is the co founder of marvelous software, soulful, MBA and connectable dot biz software after an amazing 20 year career in footwear, and gait analysis, Sandy sold her million dollar brick and mortar retail business and clinic and she now brings her business experience to the online space where she loves to create community, teach and inspire other women to find the freedom and impact they desire. Sandy has such a non no nonsense approach to money and business. And that has really changed the way hundreds maybe 1000s of women see success. Who knows how many because who knows how many listen to and she spoke. And that's how I found Sandy Connery and her co founder and co host Jenny Barcellos. So let's start our work in today with Sandy Connery. Hi, Sandy. How are you?
Sandy Connery 1:46
I'm great. Erica, thank you so much for the invite to be here. No, thank
Ericka Thomas 1:50
you so much for accepting it. I really, really am excited about this conversation. So So let's dive in first, and I'd like to start really basic and give people some context. About what exactly mindset is and what that means. Because I think sometimes we think we know what it is. And for many people that have kind of a different idea going on. So what are we really talking about when we when we talk about mindset
Sandy Connery 2:22
so to me that term, and that work is all about witnessing and watching the thoughts that are happening in our mind and then deciding Do I like it? What's it doing for me in my life? How is it showing up the result for that? Do I want to keep it or not? So it's really like literally becoming the watcher of your brain and seeing what's coming up because you're not your thoughts, right? You're not your thoughts. They're just these. This little organ in your skull is like pushing out sentences and really creating your life. And do you want to keep that sentence? Or do you want to change it? And so it's a very active process to examine your thoughts and decide with intention with purpose. What do I want to keep and what do I want to change and to what? Excellent.
Ericka Thomas 3:17
Okay, so, with that, let's take that one step deeper, because we have hundreds of 1000s of thoughts a day and how do you know what, where are those thoughts are actually rooted? You know, I mean, we I mean, they can be really surface thoughts. We have like meaningless surface thoughts all the time, that most of us pay no attention to, and most of the time they are habitual, right, we are. We just have these thoughts over and over and over again, they get really rooted. So I love how you describe that. It's very yogic right to pull back and step into that seat of the witness. But how can we how can we kind of define or sort of tease out which ones which of those thoughts are the ones that we need to let go of which are the ones that are maybe important?
Sandy Connery 4:18
Yeah, I mean, that's, that is the work right there. So I think it's always like, it's hard just to be like, okay, which thought to it like we need to have a specific situation or a result that we're not getting, or something that's frustrating us a negative emotion, that's when we can start to kind of kind of dive in. And I think like the root of it is always really interesting to me, and I do want to hopefully get to talk to about that about the money like the cause of some of our current money, beliefs. And wow, that's kind of, you know, not getting us the result that we want. But I think it's like, so, I'm a feminist business coach. Let me just use an example from that realm. So if somebody is like, frustrated with their business and they're not making money, their list isn't growing. They're not able to do the work. Like if some result is frustrating you you're not getting what you want. That's when you want to dive in and like what do you think about this? What do you think about your clients? What do you think about money? What do you think about your business when you think about marketing and so all those things and we can just look at them like is they're not necessarily surface, right? They're not like the thought, oh, I have to work really hard to make money is not a surface thought. But it's deep in there, and it only will be exposed. If we're like, Wait, why am I not making the money that I want? So there's a problem or there's a, you know, like, I'm always feeling anxious. I'm always feeling frustrated. It's that that like, will trigger the work to start to look at the thoughts that are causing that situation.
Ericka Thomas 5:54
Yes, yes. So let's let's talk about that coaching aspect because you do most of the mindset coaching inside the marvelous inner circle community. And I'd like to kind of talk a little bit about that about who is in that community who are you mostly speaking to kind of explain how that mindset coaching call came about? Yeah. And, and then we can look at, you know, maybe the why of that.
Sandy Connery 6:29
Yeah, sure. So, my partner Jenny that you mentioned in the intro, and I created the online ad tech or teaching platform called marvelous software, which is what you use in most of our clients in this program. And so we created the thing we created the tool, right and it was very important for us that women have a tool to take their knowledge, their expertise, their their wisdom, and like deliver it out there to the world to their clients to their students that need it right. And then it should be easy. And so we created that and we're like, here you go women. I mean, it's not just for women, but that's like our niche our audience. And women still had problems creating a business. Here's the thing, just like video yourself, put it up there and go and sell it. Like it's so easy, right? And then people would be like, Well, I don't know, like, how many videos do I need and like what should my price be and like all and it was so clear to us that it was like mindset, the thoughts, the beliefs, the biases, the history is, that is what is stopping women from building business. The tools are there, the knowledge is there. You can Google anything, and figure something out. But the step by step where the easy tool to use is not the only thing that you need. It's like we have to think about this differently. We got to think about ourselves differently. And it was that realization that I went and got certified as a mindset coach and then I also went further and did a feminist feminist business coaching, or feminist coaching. And that was just like mind exploded, right? Like for us personally like witnessing all these things that are coming up like oh, that's why we always do that. And then to be able to help the inner circle people who have the have the tactics, you have the tactics, but you still don't do it. And that in action, always comes back to a belief, a bias, an opinion of thought something about yourself about the world, about your business, about the clients about your product, about your pricing, whatever, like that is what is stopping you from taking the action.
Ericka Thomas 8:45
Yeah, yeah, that is that is absolutely true. And and sometimes it takes some work to follow the thread like you can notice maybe you notice the thought but you have to follow that just like a thread. On a sweater and just kind of keep following keep following it down to whatever that deeper belief is that it's really connected to and until you know that really, you can say just change your thought all day long and it doesn't really change.
Sandy Connery 9:15
No, no, no that's exactly right. And sometimes it does need like that's why I think having a coach is really helpful, because you can't really hear yourself like it's so obvious to you why things are the way and then a coach will be like why did you say that? Like did you notice that you said that? And so this external person can reflect back to you what your thinking is, and it can be so incredibly helpful. I had a coach actually was feminist when I did my feminist training, and I was getting coached and I had a situation where I own another company called connectable and there was a gentleman who was potentially interested in buying my shares, and I kind of did at the time what to sell. And I brought it to her and I was like, but I don't know what to say and like, they're gonna say this and they're gonna argue with me, and they're gonna have all these ideas and I'm not gonna be able to follow and I was rambling on and she's just like, Wait, Sandy, do you realize what's happening here? I'm like, I have no idea that I don't know how to do this. And she said, your problem is that you believe that you are not smart enough to compete, like to play in this arena. And you have a lot of shame. And I never in 1000 years would have uncovered that my deep belief about myself is that I'm not smart enough. I never would have because it's not surface. It's deep, deep, deep programming. And her she just stopped me cold, right? She just stopped me and I was like, Yeah, I think that's I'm not smart enough to go and have this negotiation. With these two men. I'm not smart enough. And it was just so simple, but I never would have found it. So that's like what you're describing is like, I can say like, I think, I don't know, I can say I believe that I don't have enough experience, but the root of that is I don't think I'm smart enough.
Ericka Thomas 11:08
Yeah, and those things come up all the time. And those mindset calls for people sometimes. And so what is that next step? So let's say you discover that, okay, I'm really smart. I think I'm not very smart. Right? You discover that deeply held belief, and who knows where it started or who gave it to you or why you're holding on to it, but is it really as simple as just changing the thought in order to let go of that?
Sandy Connery 11:41
Yeah. So I think I think it's, it is that simple, but it's not easy. It's not just like snap your fingers. Let me think something else. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it is sometimes there's something that you're just like, Oh my God. No, I'm not gonna I'm just choosing to think something else. And it's just done and it's over. But these ones are the this example about not being smart enough is much deeper work. It will take practice. And so for me, obviously the first step is just to witness it like to be, you know, shown that like, Oh, yes, and then seeing how it comes up all the time. And then just learning to see oh, what's up? I'm hesitating here. Because in this situation, I'm hesitating because it will I'm popping back to that old belief or that old paradigm, where I don't think I'm smart enough to do this. And actually, I am smart enough and I think like I just keep telling myself that like I witness that the struggles in my life. And I Oh, it's because I'm believing this like I fallen into and so it's just this like practice and habit and so I can now quickly see it, and I just don't buy it. I just don't buy it anymore. And I think there in this particular example, there was something about my belief that everyone else does understand everything all the time. And when I don't, I'm not smart, right? And so it was like, Wait a second. They don't there's a reckoning, recognizing that they too don't understand everything, but there's a part there was a black and white perfection thing going on with me like, oh, they don't know either. And I can ask this question, like, Please clarify this for me. And it doesn't mean that they're gonna see me as stupid. Like it was just, it was just this huge shift. So it's a practicing have your days again, I don't want to think like that. Here's my replacement thought. I'm going to believe that asking this question is actually the smartest thing that I can do right now. You know, and I kind of play play with the different sentences I in those moments, but it's like witnessing and reworking, witnessing and reworking
Ericka Thomas 13:49
Yeah, I think that is a really excellent example. And, and so within our group coaching community, if we use this group of women as kind of our our, our test subjects, what would you say is the most common block that comes up for for I'm going to say us, women solopreneurs wellness professionals think I mean, it can go across the board. Yeah.
Sandy Connery 14:24
Yeah. So I think there's a couple so. So just for your listeners, like we do mainly deal with women in wellness who are building like businesses, right? Like these are female entrepreneurs in wellness. And I think some of the biggest there's a couple so there's the one of the biggest ones is underpricing. Like I have to be cheap, or low priced, to be accepted to be successful. And I think that comes from I need to please everybody. Right? I need everyone to be okay with my pricing. I don't want anyone to think poorly of me if I have an expensive program. And also like if I want to help please like need to or this desire to help everyone. So if I price low, that I'm accessible to everyone, and there's so many thought errors in that whole logic that but I think that's that's like, I am a nurturer. I am a woman I want to be helpful. I want to have impact therefore I should price low. And then another one and we can dive into that if you want and then another one I think is like if you if I have a business and I have a desire to make 50k 100k Whatever the monetary goal is, but to make money, I need to work really hard. And if I work really hard, I will burn out and get sick.
Ericka Thomas 15:52
Yeah, I've heard that over and over again on our our right coaching calls. Mostly because everybody so many I won't say everybody but so many of us came to the online space. Yeah. After burnout. So it's history. Yeah, the history in the real world was the hassle till you collapse right? Yes, yeah. So there is some history there some some actual history.
Sandy Connery 16:20
So your brain is like I you already seen that. Like this is like the logic you work hard you get sick. But the but I think the thought error is like you have to work hard to make money. Like is that is that even true? That's why you guys are all we are all in business right? Like to have the freedom and the flexibility to be able to take hours off or a day off or go to your son's wedding. You know, like, right. Like, that's why we do it. But we forget that it's it's our control. It's our control. I don't have to I can work. I make the decision about how hard I work. I make the decision about how many hours I work, and I can just work smarter I'm gonna hate that expression and work smarter not harder, but I can do things that will give me the action that I can take action will give me the results. But it doesn't mean I burn out like there's there's a leap of logic there that I don't think is necessarily true. Also, we are bombarded by messages on social and just in the world, our society about about that exact thing that you work hard. The only way to make money is that people work hard, the whole hustle culture and I just I don't have to believe it. There's a certain way to do things you should do business this way. You should post on Instagram every day if you want to have success. You need to be making reels. Now if you want to, like you should you should you should you said and these are like all the things that layer in our minds like oh my god, I'm not doing this. I have to make money. I have to do this, this this, this, this and this and then I I don't want to I mean it's too much. I make money.
Ericka Thomas 17:57
And and really I mean there's as many ways to make money as there are people in the world and and so yeah, I know I know. You know that work smarter thing is cliche, but I think there could be another way to phrase it. It was like mind blowing to me to understand to like wrap my head around that I didn't have to work 40 hours, right? Like why why do I have to work 40 To do
Sandy Connery 18:26
Erica this. I know this this about you. And if you don't you are lazy.
Ericka Thomas 18:32
Yes. Exactly. Yeah. Like that is my that is always running in the back of my head at Ed. It's not true. Like you just show up with 100% of your energy when you show up. And you can get it done quicker, faster, more efficiently, and then go have fun. I mean, that's why
Sandy Connery 18:49
but that's like this concept of 40 hour week, you know, doesn't apply anymore, but it's still like we have been programmed to believe that you should work 40 hours and those who are really successful and really wealthy that you work 5060 or 70 hours and that's why they're wealthy. That's why they make money. And the moment that we pull back or try to not operate like that. There's a whole story that we're telling ourselves about how lazy we are like here's lazy right and that comes back to when I know you've heard this rant but that comes back to like the patriarchy and telling women that our value in this world is not from our mind and not from our thinking and not from these amazing programs and coaching and teaching that we can come up with. But it comes from our physical bodies and being able to work the harder we work the more valuable we are the harder we work we will survive quite literally. Right. And so we just have to unravel that and go Wait, I don't want to believe that anymore.
Ericka Thomas 19:54
Yeah, yeah. And part of that is adjusting the way we look at how we price what we're offering to the world right and it is just it's it's so true. So tempting to just show up with like at the least expensive thing to try to compete with all the free stuff that is out there. So frustrating, especially in the yoga world. When you have all of this free content on YouTube. You don't have to ever hire anyone to do anything in this world anymore. You can go and find it on YouTube for free. And yet still there are coaches and instructors that make much rain, a lot of money. Why is that? Why is it that some people can do that? And some of us just have such an issue, really putting the value on what it is that we're offering?
Sandy Connery 21:00
Because historically, women have not been valued for their thinking. They, the men were the philosophers, the men were the thinkers. The men were the business owners creators, right? We have never been valued for that. And so all of this is new. All of this as women in this era. It's new. And so we have to learn to really trust our own authority. In our business, we have to trust that we have something of value to share and that people are going to you know, want to exchange money for that. The free is it. That whole argument is so interesting to me because it like personally that never occurs to me. So you pay for the curation like yeah, I can learn how to build an online business or it could join a program like inner circle and just be like, here you go, you know and save a lot of time trying to piece it all together and understand all these voices and opinions and ways of teaching and like but you can you can write but I think like for wellness women and wellness we need and pricing is a whole other other thing. But we need to find a price that represents what your quintessential client is willing to pay in exchange for that product or service. And you can like it's a bit of an experiment. There's no like we're always searching for that perfect price. And we always have in the back of our mind. Oh, there's people doing it for free. Therefore a shouldn't really go that much higher because they're just gonna go there. But we forget that we have value as that entrepreneur as that leader as that coaches that teacher we have a ton of value and that we forget, we just like we're a commodity and we're just like everybody else. And I think we really need to start thinking about like if I run a wellness business, then I need to be well, I need to make money to cover my costs. Otherwise it's not a wellness business. Right so I'm not well off do you want I mean, like I hate if most of us are trying to keep take care of ourselves, you know, and I know like a lot of our audience is very much into self care and you know, like taking care of ourselves for the history that you just described. But it also means monetarily being safe and sound.
Ericka Thomas 23:30
Yeah, and that's really interesting because I think for when we're talking about money mindset, I don't think people look at money mindset like that as that Monday money as a way to take care of yourself. Health care. Yeah, yeah, I mean, and it's it totally is true. I mean, if you can't keep the roof over your head, then what am i Well, you're not well, this business is not good. This is not good. Yeah. So let's let's talk a little bit more in depth about money mindset. And I would just say just to just to kind of reiterate your point about setting a value putting a value on what it is that you do what it is your offer. In my experience. Whenever I priced something, whether it was a personal training package, or even just a one hour of work with me, whenever I priced it too low, I had very little response. It wasn't until I raised my prices that people were like, oh, yeah, that must be worth She must be really good. Because value received value. It's perceived value Exactly. But I also had to perceive that value. So it couldn't just be random a random number, right? Just because oh, I want this much money but yeah, that would be nice. But if I don't perceive the value also that sometimes doesn't translate to your clients and it won't come across. Yeah, so yeah,
Sandy Connery 25:03
that is the that is money mindset work right there. Is like if you see the pricing you have to like find a place where you're like, Yeah, I can believe this. I can believe this. I can go out and sell it like I can say Erica, my program is X dollars and like the energy behind which with what you deliver that the client will feel and understand Yeah, absolutely. So that's that's the important but also like women also spend like months trying to figure out a price Exactly. That I'm just like to something cheap. I don't care but get it out there. You're going to raise it later but don't like there is no perfect price. It is always an experiment. What did they say? Who bought how many didn't like it's data. It's just data and then you make this new decisions about pricing. Right. So there's a lot of people delay or procrastinate, kind of find that price that's just perfect.
Ericka Thomas 25:59
Yeah, yeah. And it's a it's a it's an excuse. It's an excuse not to put yourself out there.
Sandy Connery 26:06
Yeah. Invisible to stay hidden to stay quiet. Yeah.
Ericka Thomas 26:11
So that money mindset thing really is a big block for entrepreneurs for for fitness professionals, I think in general I know many, many fit pros who just are really doing exactly what we've been talking about trying to be accessible by underpricing them sinus. Kindness. Yes. Yes. When in actuality they they're they're robbing their clients of opportunity. They're deciding for them what it's what's worth it, you know, what is worth it. And, you know, especially yoga professionals really get caught up in that because, you know, we want things to be free or you know, we want everyone to do yoga. Right? Right. But being free doesn't make everyone do yoga. There's no, no, there's no adherence that is, you know, linked to that same thing with underserved populations and things like that. So. So why do you think why? Why is it and we talked a little bit about this already, but for women in wellness in particular, that we have so many issues, around money beyond pricing, let's get beyond like what we price our things as maybe we could talk about paying ourselves some some things like that because I know that's come up on in coaching calls, hiring other people that that kind of block like spending money on another team member or somebody to help you some of those things.
Sandy Connery 27:54
Yeah. Yeah, so I just want to go back in time for a second before we address those because I think like we could get very critical about ourselves like what's wrong with you? Like why do you think that like, why are you believing that like, Oh, my God, what are you doing wrong? And I just, I want to just say to all the women listening, like, it's really not our fault that we have a problem paying ourselves or pricing, you know, so that we can make a fair living wage or that we're okay like we just constantly spend like it comes in it comes out all of that behavior is is taught to us that we like these beliefs have been like programmed in us for hundreds of years. So for us, this is really like women in the same age of the it's the first time we've ever had access to money, the ability to go and you know, get a line of credit or open a bank account or build wealth on our own. We were the property for centuries, right? We were daughters of men, and then married off to another man, and we did not legally have the right to have anything in our own name. We didn't have the ability to own a business, none of that existed. So we don't have generations of, you know, mothers telling their daughters how to do this, how to think how to behave what what to do what to not do right like the men have. So I think just first like if you're like, God, this is my problem. I do have a money mindset problem. It's not your fault that there's something wrong with you that you've done wrong. So it's really important to just show yourself some compassion and some grace to be like, Okay, this is deep, deep societal programming over hundreds and hundreds of years. There was a study done by a bank in the UK looked at articles, financial articles, and they examined the ones that were targeted to women. And so women's magazines and 65% of those articles were telling women to hold, to tighten, to not spend to budget. And 90% of those articles said, money is scary and complicated, difficult and hard. And so that of course, like our mothers, our grandmothers have been told this for literally hundreds of years. Then that same study, they looked at the men's messaging in those financial articles, and it was all about power and strength and wealth and risk taking and just didn't like, defined the terms. How do you do to build wealth and stocks? Like it was all about go do it. Here's how, here's how you build wealth. So they're much more those they meaning like humans that have been raised as male are so much more comfortable with risk in asking the questions and figuring it out. So with there's a lot of like rah rah girl boss, women, go build businesses have the independence have the freedom, but we have to look at the unlike which is great. Absolutely. But if you can't price yourself if you can't or your program, if you can't pay yourself, if you can't take on some debt, because you think that that is debt is bad. Then we have a then we get stuck like to stagnant businesses that that are not growing. Stagnant businesses that frustrated us that we begin to resent. We can't move into a place where we can generate the sales that we want the revenue that we want the salary that we want, but I just want to say like it's the programming, it's the society, it's the culture, and it's only in this generation that we have the ability to break free of that because we can't get mortgages. We have all the knowledge, the tools available to us, but we have to undo, rewrite the code, if you will, in our brain so that we can go forward and maybe take a small loan out we can be okay with hiring someone, we can go and invest and start to build wealth.
Ericka Thomas 32:10
Right? Yeah, that was that was a lot and it it really sets the stage for change in pretty much every level in your thinking. If you understand because I think for for so many of us we don't we you know, I don't remember a time when I couldn't have a bank account or take out a loan. I don't remember that. Now. Maybe my mom, maybe you should too. She would remember that. So it's, it's it's great to be reminded about that because, you know, for my daughter like she doesn't have any concept of that because she has watched me build this business and she is started you know, she's becoming her own business as well. So like, so we're sort of unsticking ourselves from the past but it's going to take some time, some slow time. And, and this kind of work is the kind of work that is really going to help that along. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So you mentioned something in that about taking on debt. And I feel like that is a big a big block for for some of us, especially if we approach our our business as like a bootstrap business. And, and I don't know about where you are Sandy, but in the United States, there's there's someone named Dave Ramsey, Dave Ramsey, and he has this whole debt free thing the debt free snowball like get out of debt, no debt, no debt, no debt, at pay everything in cash, and it really sounds great on paper, but it really for for individual households may be fantastic and in the United States, and the United States, individual households, we have a debt problem like people live on credit for and it can be very overwhelming and dangerous. And when we approach business, if we have all of this stuff in the back of our head, it can it can really hold Business Growth back if you're not willing to step out there and use somebody else's money to help you get started. So there there has to be some sort of some sort of balance there like what I know for myself, like when I opened my business bank account, the last thing I wanted to do was open that line of credit like I was really like let's just give it six months and then we'll talk about the credit. And once I finally did it, I was like okay, every time I use that card, I had to like do some deep breathing and shake. I mean, it was like I was shaking. The first time I used that I had a card I'm like I don't know if I'm going to be able to pay that. It is scary at first if you've not stepped out like that on your own.
Sandy Connery 35:24
So no, it's such a good question. And I just think like we can't run our businesses like we run our households. Yeah, right. Like I think I think debt is neutral. Like even if you have household debt, even if you've run up your credit card because you bought whatever 10 pairs of shoes, the judgment that comes with that. Like you just have to sort of check in with yourself like how are you what are you thinking about yourself? Maybe you love it, maybe you're totally happy with it. That's completely cool. But we just have to watch the self judgment. I did something wrong. I did something bad because I have debt. Right. So that I mean, Dave Ramsey. I've never listened to him in Canada. He's not really a thing, but I heard mention of him and the whole thing is around debt. And that's great, but until you tell yourself how terrible and horrible you are, because you have debt, like what is wrong with you? You know, that's when I kind of would step in and like let's take a look. Look at this right. But with businesses, I think you're you're right. We do have to think about this differently. And debt is neutral. It's not wrong, you haven't failed if you need to, you know, go dip into the line of credit or put something on the on the credit part. The best example is like, why are we okay to go into debt for school for a four year university program? And we have no idea how we're going to pay that back yet. We won't go into depth for you know, a business where maybe you do get a business coach or you you know, buy some podcasting equipment or something like that, right. I don't think you should use your debt to for operating costs like that I struggled with but if you like are going to learn a skill, like podcasting, we'll use that like I'm going to learn how to to launch a podcast on what equipment I need, and I'm going to buy this program and I'm going to like it's going to like catapult me forward. Then you have to consider that right? Because if otherwise, we stay very, very small. And we just can't take these leaps. And it'll just be a slower growth and that's also an option, but I just don't want people to see debt as bad is it's good when you go to school, right? We've all are like yeah, of course you're gonna borrow money to go to school. It's not a problem. There's no more like there's no good or bad it's just like this thing that we do. And can we not apply that sort of same thinking to to business like sometimes I gotta borrow money to go and do this thing so that I can get more, sell more, think differently, be differently, traveled to a conference, meet people network, whatever.
Ericka Thomas 38:08
Right? And there is yeah, there's a lot to that reframing. I know. I know for me, I really looked at a lot of the courses and things that I invested in early on I looked at that, like my own curated online MBA
Sandy Connery 38:28
program. Right, right.
Ericka Thomas 38:30
Exactly. Rather than going to actually going back to school, right. I want to being right, getting an MBA that would not apply to online business at all right? Right would have been great, but I doubt that it would have been as focused right. So
Sandy Connery 38:47
if you had done that people would have been like, of course, you're gonna go borrow money for your University MBA, but if you're like, I just bought up whatever $10,000 coaching package with court whatever like they'd be like Oh, you did? What? Like you borrowed like, it's bad. Like you've done something wrong. And to me it's the same thing.
Ericka Thomas 39:06
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And as long as you're you're choosing I mean, in my mind, I'm like, well just choose wisely. Like even now like something in my like when you said like, to spend $10,000 on a coaching package. I better really love that person. To do the work because yeah, like
Sandy Connery 39:26
there's there's something to that as well like, I just spent two grand on something so I'm gonna like watch every I'm gonna get every ounce I can out of it. Like you can take that approach. We've also bought things that were like, Lord, what did we just do? And we're like, you know, we don't do it all. And then, of course, we can go into the like, Oh, what a waste of money or we can say but we met that person in that group, and that person has opened these doors, and it was worth every penny, right? Like it's, those are two different thoughts. And you can just choose how you want to think about that situation. If I didn't go through all the courses in the 2000s or all the lessons in the $2,000 course. I have the option to tell myself how terrible I am and how like lazy I am and how I never complete anything. Right? Or I can say you know what I didn't do at all. It's okay, but I did this, this this this and it's fantastic. And it was worth 2000 totally optional, which way you want to look at it.
Ericka Thomas 40:26
Right? It's just it's a learning a different way to approach how you spend your money and what you're getting out of what you're spending your money on. For your business. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah,
Sandy Connery 40:40
yeah. And you can you could beat yourself up over the past and it just does get you nowhere. So it is what it is. And that's like, yeah, what's next?
Ericka Thomas 40:49
Exactly? What's next? What's next. So what are your what are some of your favorite mindset tools, I guess, that you would recommend to people or ways for listeners to really kind of start this process, this mindset work? What is the best way to kind of approach it?
Sandy Connery 41:15
Yeah, so I think the first if you recognize like, oh wait, I do have some money hanging up here like what is going on? I think you just need to figure that out. And one of my favorite questions is what do you think about people who have money? Like all this stuff comes out? And yeah, I know you've seen us on some of the calls like we had one of our clients who was like they she had seen somebody in a big fancy car not stopped for pedestrian and she just like rolled her eyes and was like, rich people are terrible. Right? You know, they're just rude. Right? And then she says like what? But these again, this is like the exposing part. So like, what do you think about rich people? I love that question. Because most of us that think that they're, you know, they cheat, they lie they scam they're awful. They're unethical, they did something, you know, like there's all so why are you going to attract money into your life or go and do the work to earn money when you believe that you're going to be like them?
Ericka Thomas 42:20
That's big. That's big.
Sandy Connery 42:23
I have a client or not a client, a friend who's she told me one day hurt her husband, his siblings, a lot of them have a lot of money and she's like their kids are terrible. are so bad. Her mind, you have money, you have bad kids. And you say it out loud. You're like what? Like that is one of those things that you can like you can change really quickly but the association is usually you are in some somehow bad if you have money, and that is a huge pillar right there. Right? I want to be like damn, therefore, that the logic is the money is causing the character. And so it's I think this is really commonly said but like if you have money, it's just going to amplify or accentuate who you already are is not going to turn you into a bad person. There's nothing to fear there.
Ericka Thomas 43:18
Right. Right. Yeah. You mentioned you mentioned something in that about attracting money and repelling money. So yeah, can you explain that a
Sandy Connery 43:28
little bit thoughts? Yeah, sure. So if you say like what, what I see a lot is people who I have a goal I have a dream I have a business I want this thing was to say I want to make 50 grand, great, and then they don't do the work. To make the 50 Grand because they believe that money is bad. Money is somehow like wrong. And you know, like there's some negative association with money that is going to repel it. And I don't I I just mean that you're not going to do the work. You're not going to go do the launch. You're not gonna go create the challenge. You're not gonna go and like, I don't know, write the blog post with the pop up that gets you new email lists. You know, like there's like these like cascade of things. Because deep down you're like, I don't want to be that person. I don't want to be like that. And so that's when you can start to unravel and go Wait, what if like, you can play so one of the tools is like playing the opposite. Like, what if I did this work and I had the money and I could like you can start to imagine what is possible for you not fall into the trap. Of like these old patterns, beliefs. So I think a lot of women too will be in business will be like, they like what you were saying like just the past. That didn't work. I tried this. It didn't work. It didn't work. It didn't sell. Nobody wants me stop that it ended at like all this negative. And so part of the attraction is like, can you start to see all the abundance around you? What do you have because our brains are going to default to the negative our brains are going to default to the worst case scenario and if you just like take that in sort of passively, then you're just like a sitting duck. You know, nothing's nothing's gonna change for you. So there's this active exercise of like, how do I have abundance in my world? How do I have abundance in my business? And in my clients, right to see the other half so it's like equal AirPlay we can if we passively sit back, let our brains run the show. It's going to show us all the lack and all the scarcity on all the things that didn't work, but we need to have equal airplay on like, what did work? How many clients did I actually get? How many new ones that I what great conversations came out. How many sales did you actually make was it all starts with one right and so we just need to play this like equal. It's so often a game I play is like if I have a complaint, I balance it with like something that's really good. Like 5050
Ericka Thomas 46:17
Yeah, and and just a thought that popped into my head while you're talking about that. It's I don't think that we can have an idea to make something or offer something. Unless it's possible. I don't think you can imagine. Imagine something without it being present and ready to come to you. I don't think the universe works that way. I think if you have if you can dream this business up, then it is ready for you and and all you have to do is one step at a time it doesn't have to be gigantic steps just simple moving toward just move towards it so it can come to you
Sandy Connery 17:04
yeah, yeah. I like to imagine in that same same idea is like, I like to imagine that there are all these people in my sphere that are clients, and they're just out there. And I just need to take a couple actions to draw them in. I heard this great analogy the other day about like a tongue whistle, like your marketing and selling like you know, like if you blow on a dog whistle only the dogs can hear it. The humans can't hear it. And that's kind of like your marketing is like if you can get out there and say, what you think and what you believe and we've been doing a lot of work with you guys about like amplifying your message and like say something was gather and say something and the people that need to hear it will be will hear it and come in so I love this like idea that they you don't know who they are yet. They haven't clicked by yet. But they are out there. They're out there circling and waiting for you to just speak and ask and invite and I love that image in my mind versus like the, again, a failed launch. Nobody bought and booted it up. You know like that. It's so easy and comfortable and familiar to go down that path versus like it's possible like what you just said it is possible and I just need to keep showing up in key because it like it's not possible until it is right.
Ericka Thomas 48:30
Right right. Yeah and and all those people out there who only hear that one thing that you say, I mean, you don't know who they are. You don't know where they are. And they might really need to hear that. And so it's really irresponsible not to go out there and speak you want Yeah, honestly, I mean, you're you're you're again robbing them of something that could really change their life for for all time. So just put it out there. Jump into the arena. And
Sandy Connery 49:11
be there. I want to say exactly what you said. And trust your authority, like trust your own self because we too often look to was women look to the outside for approval. Did I do this right? Is this the right amount of time to how many words does this blog post need to be is this right? Did I do this right? How do I actually does this I felt like we're constantly looking for outside approval. And when we are building a business and when we are not getting the results like you know I only got five new opt ins I really sold one or whatever the the numbers are. We start to judge and question whether we are worthy. Whether we are should be here, maybe I should go get another certification. Like can we not just trust that our thoughts and ideas and programming that no I'm not saying you need to be like some full, philosophical, philosophical thinker out there that has like unique, you know, brand new ideas. It just needs to be Erica, with her lived experience and her thoughts and ideas showing up with her programs and her training and her whatever in the way that she does. Like that is enough, and we need to believe that and trust that and then let it flow. Let it come.
Ericka Thomas 50:30
Yeah, yeah. 100% That was That was fantastic, Sandy. Well, I think this has been an amazing conversation. Is there anything that we didn't hit on that you feel like might be an important point to make?
Sandy Connery 50:51
I just want to say to all the women that making money is your path to freedom and choice and to safety. And that I what I want for everybody, every woman is to not feel like they don't have the choice to live that their the way that they want. And I think the freedom comes from money. And I think if I want all women to be financially independent, that's really what I want so that they can do whatever they're not relying on a partner. They're not reliant on a parent. It's like, I make my own money. I have my own choice, my own freedom and I can take care of myself and children if they have them.
Ericka Thomas 51:29
Beautiful, beautiful. Thank you Sandy. So I always ask all my guests on the work in to share what their work in is something that brings that balance could be business could be just for fun. It could be whatever lights you up, but it's an internal work that kind of brings you joy.
Sandy Connery 52:01
Yeah, for me, it is. Self coaching seems like such an obvious answer, but for me, it's like witnessing what we're just talking about like seeing like, if something's not working in my life, why what am I doing? What am I feeling what am I thinking I will do this sort of self examination to find that root and then work to change it and that is how I believe that is how you can change your life. So I am less willing to feel like a victim in financial like a victim to money and emotional victims or money or even an emotional victim to social anything. Like I will not accept it. And I just work to find those thoughts through a self coaching process to like okay, what's going on here? And then I tried to change the thought so it's an ongoing work, endless work.
Ericka Thomas 52:53
Amazing. Yes. Well said. If people wanted to reach out to you, Sandy and get in touch with you or work with you, where can they find you? And how can they do that?
Sandy Connery 53:07
Sure. So I think the first way is our podcast that you mentioned, and thank you for that. It's called and she spoke where we're talking about women in business and money. And then the second is, we hang out on Instagram mostly so at humorless and then our website is hey, marvelous.com all the programs are on there.
Ericka Thomas 53:27
Wonderful. Thank you so much for joining me today. Sandy. It was awesome.
Sandy Connery 53:32
That was fun. Thank you.
Ericka Thomas 53:36
Thanks for joining me on this week's work in next week. You're shifting gears to take a look at one of my favorite topics in fitness, energy, yours and your clients, how to find more of it, harness it and recharge it. If you like what you heard today and are curious to see some of these things in action. You can follow me on Instagram at real savage grace, or on Facebook at savage Grace coaching. And I would be forever grateful if you would give the work in a like and share or a five star review on Apple or Spotify. You can find links to everything we talked about on this podcast in the show notes and the easiest way to get to those is to visit savage Grace coaching.com. Forward slash the work in. Thanks everyone, and I'll see you next time.
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